Practice Makes Pleasure

What this is

A one-day workshop for couples, singles, and anyone ready for more aliveness in their relationships and their everyday life.

Most of us were never taught to ask for what we want. Not because we're broken — but because we were conditioned not to.

We learned to go along. To not make waves. To anticipate what others needed and quietly shelve our own. That conditioning runs deep — and it shows up everywhere.

In the raise you deserved but never asked for.

In the dinner you wished someone would make so you could finally go take that class you've had your eye on.

In the relationship where your needs live mostly in silence.

These aren't personality traits. They're patterns. And patterns can change — but only with practice. New experiences. New imprints. A felt sense in your body of what it actually feels like to ask, to be heard, and to receive.

That's what this day is.

We practice here — in a safe and supported space — so it becomes available everywhere else. At work. In friendships. In family. And yes, eventually, in the bedroom too. But it starts long before that.

Over six hours, in good company, with our embodied awareness and our honest voices, we'll move through a sequence of practices drawn from the Wheel of Consent® — the groundbreaking framework developed by Dr. Betty Martin that's been revolutionizing how people relate, communicate and find their way back to themselves.

You'll have the opportunity to choose — if, how and when you want to participate in each practice. The entire day is about choosing moment to moment what would serve you best, and feeling safe enough to do so.

You'll find out where you hold back when you want to lean in. Where you say yes when you mean something closer to maybe not. And what it actually feels like — in your body, not just your head — to ask for what you want, even if it feels scary.

This isn't about getting it right. It's about getting real.

We'll gather in person — at a private home in Rochester, NY.

Why this matters

Most of us were also never taught to orient to what feels good for us. We were taught to perform or pretend. To anticipate. To put others first. To give what we thought was wanted and receive whatever was given, even if it wasn’t what we truly desired.

But, here's what nobody tells us: the more honest we are, the more alive we feel.

And that feeling — ease in your body, comfort in your relationships, genuine aliveness in the small moments of your day — isn't a luxury.

It's a resource.

The more of it you have, the more capacity you have.

For everything. For hard conversations, creative work, showing up fully, loving well.

This doesn't take from your life. It funds it.

The moment you can feel what you actually want and need— and say it out loud — everything changes.

Your body wakes up. The chronic low-grade numbness that comes from years of half-wanting and half-receiving starts to lift. You remember what it feels like to be in your skin.

Your yes becomes real. And so does your no. Which means every yes you give from here carries actual charge — in touch, in conversation, in life.

You stop performing and start feeling. There’s a difference between going through the motions and being genuinely, fully present. You know it when you feel it.

Your relationships shift. Not just in touch. In every room you walk into. Every conversation you have. Every relationship you’re in.

The practices in this workshop are just as relevant in a business negotiation or a family dinner,

as they are in the bedroom.

Knowing who is doing what and who it's for — that clarity changes everything.

Nobody arrives here already knowing how. Even I am still finding my edges. That's the whole point — shared practice illuminates what we can't see alone.

Couples find each other again across a single afternoon. Singles discover the conversation they needed to have was with themselves first.

And the ease, comfort and aliveness available in all your relationships? It expands. Because you finally learned to do three things:

Discover what you want. Ask for it. Receive it fully.

What to expect

We begin by slowing down.

Not because anything is wrong — but because most of us arrive carrying the speed of our lives. Before anything else we land, take a breath, and feel our way back into the room we're actually in.

From there we make agreements together — not rules, but a living container. A shared yes to honesty, care, and showing up for ourselves and each other. Safety isn't assumed here. It's built, together, in the first hour.

The day moves through seven practices drawn from the Wheel of Consent® — each one building on the last, each one designed to deepen your capacity to know what you want, ask for it clearly, and receive it fully. Everything works through voice, awareness and honest communication.

Two practices offer an optional invitation to request touch — nothing more than elbow to hand. You will never be asked to do anything you haven't actively chosen.

With every practice comes a moment of return — back to shared space — to reflect and harvest what you noticed. This is where the real shifts happen, in the seeing.

Curious what a practice actually looks like? Here's one:

In pairs, for two minutes, Partner A makes simple genuine requests — anything from "will you get me a glass of water" to "will you give me a million dollars?” Whatever is alive for Partner A in the moment. (There’s usually a lot of laughter!)

Partner B says “yes” to everything, without actually fulfilling the request. They switch roles. Repeat for another 2 minutes.

It’s a practice of finding and asking for what you want, and feeling then what it’s like to give and receive a “yes”.

What sounds almost too simple turns out to be one of the most revealing experiences of the day.

The rest you'll discover.

By the end of our time together, you'll have moved through something, because you practiced, repeatedly, the thing most of us never learned: knowing what you want and don’t want and finding the words.

That's where the pleasure lives. Not at the end of a road — but in every moment you chose yourself honestly along the way.

Come curious. Leave changed.

Want to hear it straight from me?

I recorded a short audio answering the questions I've heard most — including the ones people haven't quite said out loud yet.

Real questions. Honest answers.

Click each one to explore.

The details

Date: Sunday, June 7, 2026

Time: 10 am — 4:30 pm

• Snacks and tea will be provided throughout the day. Bring your own lunch for the 1 — 2 pm break. Outdoor and indoor areas, to relax or go for an after lunch walk.

Location: A private home in Rochester, NY (address shared upon registration)

Group size: 15 people maximum

Tuition: $177

• One Assistant Exchange spot for full tuition available for someone who’d like to contribute their time and presence on the day, helping to hold the container, assisting with setup and clean up. Reach out directly if this is you.

Can't make June 7th? Message me and I'll make sure you hear about the next workshop!

Prefer something more personal? This same work is available as a private 1:1 or couples immersion. Get in touch and we'll talk.

Want to keep going? Completing this workshop opens the door to a 6 week practice group beginning June 2026. Details coming soon — but it starts here.

Ready to join us?

A note from Amanda

You want more.

More ease in your body. More pleasure and aliveness in your relationships. More of yourself showing up in your own life.

I know — because I've wanted the same things. And because people tell me this every day.

I've been doing this work since 2016. In that time I've sat with hundreds of people in some of the most honest, tender, surprising conversations of their lives — and mine. I've watched people remember things about themselves they didn't know they'd forgotten. I've seen couples find each other again across a single afternoon. I've felt what happens in a room when people decide, together, to stop pretending and start feeling.

This workshop is the distillation of everything I know about what becomes possible when we slow down, get honest, and give ourselves permission to actually want what we want.

I built it because I believe that in times like these — being present enough to consistently orient to what we want and need in all areas of life and the ability to then speak up are not luxuries. They're how we survive — and how we insist on thriving.

I can't wait to be with you!